@iwearaonesie: Apparently the first thing you should say after you back over your wife's foot is "I'm sorry" not "I guess that means no sex tonight"
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@sara_ashlynn: I'm a long-term thinker. For instance, the green bananas I bought will be delicious in 2 days.
@Quartzjixler: Thanks, meeting venue that turns off the AC in the restrooms--I love emerging from taking a dump looking like I just ran a marathon!
@Sanbel11: "Baby, I'm in the bedroom waiting for you" Now I got your attention, let me show you a proper way to make the bed.