@Mmelulu: Apparently the owners of Aldi and Lidl were really brothers. Presumably Aldi was the alder one and Lidl the Lidl one.
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@notacroc: [restaurant] ME: *reading menu* how's the chicken parm? OUR WAITER, TONY THE TIGER: it's grr- MANAGER: *glares at Tony* TONY: it's exquisite
@House_Feminist: Whenever a tweet doesn't do well initially I think "weird, every single person on the internet must be busy right now"