@Mmelulu: Apparently the owners of Aldi and Lidl were really brothers. Presumably Aldi was the alder one and Lidl the Lidl one.
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@Lisabug74: My cat and I made a best friend pact tonight. If I die first, he won't eat my body. Or if he dies first, I won't use his skull as a cup.
@NJFreudian: My therapist asked me, "How would leaving twitter make you feel?" I replied by asking him, "How would switching therapists make you feel?"
@ArfMeasures: ME: Then the robber came thru the door holding a gun COP: Was it a revolver? ME [thinks] No he just pushed it open & walked thru like normal