@wendchymes: Apparently you can't just drop your ex off at the morgue just cause they are dead to you.
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@TomTheWicked: Facebook: "Do you want to tag Jennifer in this Picture?" Me: Hmmmm. does it make her look fat? Then yes, yes I do.
@daemonic3: ME: [sees old friend with new wife] Hey congrats on the wedding! Where did you marry? HIM: Maui ME: Oh, sowwy! Where did you mawwy her?
@FinnMcIver: I really hate it when people repeat something twice when making a point. don't do that guys, don't do that.