@NotthatAdamWest: April Fool's Day pregnancy jokes stopped being fun when my parents started getting excited instead of scared.
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@Piecezilla: The weatherman said it's nice outside. I guess they don't let him watch the rest of the news.
@LackOfShame: Mom: "Why are you always on your phone? What's so great about the internet?" Me: It doesn't constantly ask me questions
@WhiteFolkProbs: Ordered a honey bee kit off Amazon. Can’t wait to tell my co-workers all the benefits of honey that I Googled right before telling them.
@preritpathak: People on Facebook Nowadays: *Clicks pic while sipping coffee* *Posts as DP with irrelevant caption: Every scar makes me who I am* WTF?