@StatMan_Who: Are @bt_uk responsible for the crime and violence in our society? @funTweeters @TheComedyHumor @OurNameIsFun
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@stephenjmolloy: Magician: "Think of a card." Me: "Okay." Magician: "You are thinking of the.. 3 OF SPADES!" Me: "I was thinking about a get well soon card."
@ArfMeasures: GF: What's my biggest flaw? ME: You haven't got any, you're perfect, I love you GF: No come on, I mean pacifically ME: We should split up
@SatansTongue: "You can be anything!" Okay I'm going to be Kanye west "Josh that's not what I meant" Shhhh *puts my finger to her lips* It's Kanye now