@hoops_Daddy: If it looks like a duck, Sounds like a cat, And walks like robot, You took too many pain killers.

@JayFinW: There's a Gulf between peoples' appreciation of cartoons. Dubai doesn't like the Flintstones, but Abu Dhabi do.

@SaraMansford: Dear parents buying holiday gifts for teachers: They don't want candles or a Starbucks GC. They put up with your kids. They want wine.

@MandiAtRandom: Might be time to get in shape. Halfway up these stairs and I'm considering setting up base camp and trying again in the morning.

@WheelTod: Dating tip for ladies: some guys will be scared off if you don't wait until the third date before asking him to murder your husband.