@FattMernandez: Are there Jewish exorcisms? Where the demon comes out, and just tells you to call your mother?
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@KimMonte10: Be a sharp dressed man. Buy a suit made of knives. Scare ur boss into promoting u. Cut everyone's sandwiches for them in the break room.
@GABBYdaAngSaya: Her: I'm leaving you Me: Because of the ancient Roman literature puns? Her: Yah Me: But Aenid you
@QwertyJones3: [group therapy] "I always feel unnoticed" NINJA: I hear ya CHAMELEON: Same GUY WITH CAMOUFLAGE PANTS: It's like we're all soulmates
@One_FineMess: A cig takes 7 minutes off your life A piece of bacon takes 9 minutes off your life According to my calculations I should have died in 1812