@simoncholland: Are we sure the wise men who brought frankincense and myrrh weren't just trying to sign Mary up for their essential oils pyramid scheme?
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@causticbob: Someone broke into my house last night and left a note saying they'd broken one of my keyboard keys. I onder hich one.
@SolelyB: I get worried when someone posts a kitten pic with a foreign language, I don't know if they're showing a cute kitty pet or their dinner.
@AmishPornStar1: Just refilled my Smartwater water bottle with regular dumb water... So far, nobody can tell the difference.
@sidleykate: People say you have to study Shakespeare in school, but Shakespeare never studied Shakespeare and look at him. He became Shakespeare.