@pickupIines: are you a cat because i'm feline a connection between us
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@KalvinMacleod: PERSONAL TRAINER: so how much do you bench? ME: a fair bit but I usually bed or sofa.
@AnotherFunnyGuy: Her: Dude, back off. You're totally scaring away all the hot guys checking me out at the gym. Me: You do realize I'm your boyfriend right?
@tjcirimele: *cat lays on my leg* *I remain perfectly still for hours, so she won't leave* *I move half an inch* *cat buys bus-ticket for next town over*
@JarodNotJared: Its the little things that bring the most joy - Like sneaking a home pregnancy test in the shopping cart of a mom/daughter combo & observing