@pickupIines: are you my appendix because i don't understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out
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@DaddyJew: Interviewer: how do you feel about traveling? Me: oh I dont know, I mean I just met you
@Darlainky: Me: Want to see me do The Robot? Friend: Sure. Me: Friend: Why aren't you moving? Me: Updating software.
@GrantTanaka: Man buns are just the beginning, next thing you know it’ll be ok for men to have anything on their heads, like a goat or a small child
@bazecraze: If you're thinking of getting a hairless cat, go the extra mile and get a catless cat.