@iscoff: "Are you pro gay?" he asked. "Amateur at best," I replied
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@iwearaonesie: the hardest part of your wife going into labor is everyone interrupts the movie by asking questions
@briangaar: Girl, my life is full of tragedy. In 1997, my girlfriend was killed by a guy named Sephiroth. AND she was our party's only healer :(
@aka_fatman: *Jesus, bursting out of a chest cavity, spraying the room with blood and viscera* "My God, Johnny? DID YOU LET CHRIST INTO YOUR HEART?!?"