@o__0Dev: Are you watching too much T.V but not doing enough reading? Turn your subtitles on. Boom, problem solved!
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@iRowlf: Can prisoners ask for The Olive Garden's Endless Pasta for their last meal? If so, I think I just found a loophole in our judicial system.
@JasonLastname: *approaches drive-thru window on a camel* "Sir, here's your 17 big macs and a large milkshake." May I please have a straw? *camel collapses*
@ShaunRightNow: I'm married, yet the only person that willingly goes down on their knees in front of my crotch is a 72 year old suit tailor named Pablo.
@sirivan: There’s no problem you can’t solve with a great night of dancing. Except for a broken foot. Then you should see a doctor.