@realslimswamy: Arm wrestling is for guys who like to hold hands with other guys while staring into their eyes.
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@Hey_Sascha: Nothing is quite as scary as hearing your doorbell ring on the same night you made a blood sacrifice to the dark lord.
@comer310: Me: Anything you can do I can do better, I CAN DO ANYTHING BETTER THAN YOU! Mom: Why are you yelling at the dog?
@Book_Krazy: [Airport security] Guard: Your flight leaves in 5 minutes Centipede: No problem. I'll just run. I have 100 legs. Guard: Remove your shoes
@JBusch260: "She loves me not..." : Picks last petal : "She LOVES ME!" Flower: "...NOT! LOL nerd" : Whips out hidden petal shaped like middle finger :