@joekellyjk47: As a child, it really stressed me out that Rocky was late to his second fight with Apollo Creed. I mean, don't be late to that.
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@murrman5: "do you know the best way to get rid of a wasp nest?" no, try using your phone [throws phone and hits wasp nest] *running* I meant google it
@Try2StopME: I wrote to the Bank: "My Cheque was returned with remark 'Insufficient funds'. I want to know whether it refers to mine or the Bank?"
@Teowulf: When people post sad things on Facebook I just want to hug them and whisper softly in their ears, "no one cares."
@capricecrane: Accidentally walked into the men's room so I just went ahead and used the urinal so it wouldn't be awkward for anyone.