@shutupmikeginn: As a child, 'The Jetsons' gave me unrealistic expectations for the future: like having a wife who loves me & owning a dog.
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@Rollmaninoz: Diary June 28 1954 So it turns out my weakness is kryptonite. I can't tell anybody this. June 30 1954 I accidentally told Lex. Should be ok
@PostCultRev: Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. Better yet, dress for jobs that don't even exist. Werewolf psychiatrist. Clown assassin.
@the_moonface: I touch myself when I think of you. It's not what you're thinking, I'm mostly scratching my head wondering what I saw in you.
@jakebrodes: chik-fil-a employee: It Would Be My Dying Wish To Serve You, Great Lord me: I just want some nuggets man cfa employee: I Would Die For You