@jwoodham: As a white man, it's hard to deal with the fact that I have a far greater chance of becoming a serial killer than I do of becoming a rapper.
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@Cheeseboy22: My son is petrified of thunder. I told him that is ridiculous, it's the lightning that will kill him.
@daemonic3: "Choose password" > 123bob "Password must not contain common names & must be complex with at least 50 characters" > gameofthrones "OK"
@0point5twins: - Fred, Velma, Shaggy... Can you name one of the 'Big 5' African animals? - Rhino - We know you do, Scooby, but it's not your team's turn
@LoveNLunchmeat: Parenthood is where you spend 18 years saying no all because of that one critical time you said yes.