@jwoodham: As a white man, it's hard to deal with the fact that I have a far greater chance of becoming a serial killer than I do of becoming a rapper.
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@SirEviscerate: Are you eating Jell-O? Cow: "Yeah." You know what gelatin is made from, right? Cow: "No, what?" Uh. Rainbows. Enjoy, buddy.
@LindaInDisguise: I hope my husband never gets Alzheimer's but if he does, I imagine my favorite part will be saying "I gave you one yesterday."