@jbryantiii: As a young child my mom told me I could be anything I wanted to be. It turns out that the police call this identity theft.
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@Eden_Eats: Hey men, don't be fooled by maxipad commercials. Ladies aren't really full of blue windshield washer fluid.
@usermcuserface: A Canadian has a bad day: (Traps a goose, and casts a spell) Fly my lovely. Be aggressive. Block traffic, and shit everywhere. Be my wrath..
@ibid78: GOD: let's make an armored raccoon that turns into a bowling ball ANGEL: but why wou- GOD: and we'll call it an armadillo for some reason