@jbryantiii: As a young child my mom told me I could be anything I wanted to be. It turns out that the police call this identity theft.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@VeggieMonger: Someone suggested that I try Acupuncture. I don't think adding more pricks will make a difference.
@SirEviscerate: There are no atheists in parking lots where you've dropped your phone face down on the asphalt.
@beccafacexo: If I ever get kidnapped, my plan is to just talk non-stop about Lost until they see that I'm very annoying, and they return me to safety.