@SteussieErica: As a young girl she played the game Operation and dreamed about the day she could illegally harvest vital organs in real life.
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@themiltron: Baby Bear: Someone’s been eating my porridge! Mama: That’s wonderful, dear. Papa never eats Mama’s porridge anymore. Papa: Jesus, Linda...
@Marlebean: "I have to eat every 7 minutes or I get cranky." "Ma'am, that's not a valid reason to be excused from jury duty."
@Sassafrantz: If a bear tries to attack you in the woods, give it your bicycle. Maybe it's one of those circus bears, you never know.
@david8hughes: [Joseph & Mary answers door to god] "Mary, you're looking well." [Joseph puts arm around Mary & raises an eyebrow] "Jesus, your dad's here."