@johnnyw1981: As I lay my phone down to sleep, I pray my brain won't think of tweets. If I die before I wake, I pray and hope my phone to break.
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@Rica_Bee: I can never hear what my kids are up to while I'm in the shower so I just yell "HEY cut it out!" every 60 seconds and hope that keeps them in line
@radtoria: my cat is wearing a cone & has learned to scoop up his food and let it slide into his mouth and it's giving me serious ideas, folks
@BuckyIsotope: I HATE THE NEW NEIGHBOR *wife sighs* “Is this because his grill is bigger than yours” *frantically duct taping 2 grills together* NO