@michaelianblack: As new head of Westboro Baptist Church, I'm expanding who God hates. To start: delivery guys, vegetarians, and people who do Sudoku.
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@lecalabara: Home Alone 6: Homeland Security - Everyone in Washington D.C. has gone on vacation and left Kevin in charge!
@LurkAtHomeMom: My 4 year old spilled water on his bathing suit, so he can't go in the pool until he changes and this is why vodka is a thing.