@ComedicBust: As soon as I get to a party, I start saying goodbye; that way I'm out of there within 4 hours.
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@decentbirthday: guy: excuse me, can you jump my car me: *tying shoes* probably how tall is it guy: no like- me: *handing phone* take a video
@omgthatspunny: I have an eating disorder; I'm about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets.
@MsReyda: Men always criticize our big ole purses but stay asking us for something out of it. "U got gum?" "Give me some lotion" "Hold my gun"