@chuuew: As the zombies swarm, I ask for one last selfie. By the time they realise their dead flesh won't activate the touch screen, I'm long gone.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@StellaRtwot: Turns out those miniature liquor bottles aren't for babies and now my brother says I can't be the God Mother.
@alisha_foley: Telling someone they can't be sad because others have it worse is like telling someone they can't be happy because others have it better.
@ItsAndyRyan: Doctor: "Why is my waiting room empty?" Judge: "I hauled everyone off to court" Doctor: "You're trying my patients"