@TheJustinDuncan: Asian women look 16 forever and one day out of nowhere look 159 years old.
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@iGreenMonk: I touch myself when I think of you Oh! Wait It's not what you're thinking, I mean I'm mostly scratching my head wondering what I saw in you.
@shkeeber: Nephew: Really?! Me: Yup! Go for it! N: *runs into wall* Me: *takes pic* N: *wakes up* Am I at Hogwarts? Me: No, we'll try again later.