@_RyanBryce: Asked the burd in Krispy kremes for 5 Nutella donuts and she says "have you got any nut allergies" aye pal I'm planning suicide by donut
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@Crunk_Jews: [first date] Her: I like a guy who gets a little nasty Me: [puts hand sanitizer away] I used a gas station bathroom once
@PaulyPeligroso: They call Japan the "Land of the Rising Sun". Is that why they look like they're squinting all the time?
@SumbodyShootMe: My daughter said she was in a memoir. I was intrigued until I realized what she said was meme war. Whatever tickles your fancy, Love.