@suzieQ0007: At a wedding where the minister told everyone to stand next to the person who makes life worth living. The bartender was almost trampled.
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@goodhairperson: Her hands were garlic breadsticks of action. Her face was a Cesar salad of expression.
@John_M15: Saw an article on Facebook that a local bank was robbed. It had one like. They should probably look at that person as the robbery suspect.
@IamEveryDayPpl: I give my stoner friends fruitcake for Christmas just so I can imagine them hating me a little while they can't help eating it.
@PaperWash: [dog on trial for murder] lawyer: who's a good boy? dog: I am lawyer: your honor I rest my case