@HeyZeus666: At my age, my biggest fantasy is to sleep through the night without having to pee every two hours.
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@Epygma: *i get chased into a dark alley* Please no *two men walk up to me holding a knife* "If you join our insurance you can save up to-" NOOOOOOO
@dafloydsta: [job interview] Says here you're good with nicknames? "I don't wanna brag Super Cool Interviewer Man" *under his breath* holy shit he's good
@markleggett: I'm on the powerlifting forums, trying to convince everyone that kissing another man before you bench gives you an awesome adrenaline boost.