@vineyille: [at my comedy central roast after every joke] That’s not true
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@markleggett: People who push and shove to get on a flight before other passengers are possibly going to get to their end destination one second faster.
@imteddybless: when i tell guys i want a baby i just assume they kno i don't mean a human one. i want a baby antelope, a baby hedgehog, a baby lizard
@KeetPotato: reporter: tell us what happened me: some BEEEPing motherBEEEPer crashed into my car reporter: you dont have to say beep we put them in after