@Hellaphantitis: At my funeral play the Super Mario original theme until my casket is lowered in the ground then play the underground music
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@neiltyson: i wonder if fewer people would eat Rabbit Stew if it was instead called Bunny Rabbit Stew.
@Book_Krazy: *Buys world map* *Pins map to wall* *Promises to visit wherever dart lands* *Throws dart at fridge*
@Ant_F3ltz: Little known fact: If you ride any animal in the zoo for more than 30 seconds... it's yours to keep.
@david8hughes: [fancy restaurant] Me: do you have orange cat food? Wife [whispers to waiter]: he means lasagna