@BookishBunny: At this point most of the hugs I'm involved in are just my kids using me as a napkin.
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@NYC_Blonde: I recognize that Rome wasn't built in a day but I'm not trying to build Rome, I just want to to enjoy onion rings without gaining weight.
@goldengateblond: LIFE HACK: Make your waist feel dramatically smaller by accidentally trying on maternity pants.
@brennadine: Hang on guys. My boyfriend told me not to be anxious, so I expect to feel better any moment.
@UncleDuke1969: *cocks gun* Me: "Go ahead." Horse: "Just be cool, man." Me: "DRINK." Horse: "No problem. It's just a stupid expression."