@uMakeMeBad: At Walmart with a box of condoms and a Barbie play set, now I need to pick the right cashier to ensure maximum awkwardness for us both.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@WarrenHolstein: Having a traditional Columbus Day. Headed to a casino to hand out blankets with smallpox on them.
@Tommytoughstuff: [Meeting] *Gestures to pie chart* "Now as you can see this chart is not nearly as delicious as it sounds."
@TheWadest: Somewhere, a ninja watches "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant." An imperceptible smile creeps across his lips. "Damn right you didn't."