@EricGoldie: Ate a vegetable about 5 hours ago...Still no abs.
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@onume_: The girl next to me is texting her friend about how there's an annoying guy looking at her phone, lemme show her which emojis to use.
@pizzajaynow: People who only tweet inspirational stuff are the same people who reminded their school teacher about homework assignments.
@ilovepie84: Somebody should tell Forrest Gump that on the back of the box of chocolates it tells you exactly what you're going to get.