@zachreinert03: Ate at w pho restaurant and based on my waitress' facial reaction I'm not sure if I asked for a fork or killed her entire family
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Cyd10e: 4 y/o: What's your job? Me: I stay at home, take care of you, clean, cook the food... 4: That sounds boring. Do you want me to fire you?
@Caissie: My son on the morning of his prom: "Well, it just occurred to me that I paid $130 to go to my school at night."
@Piecezilla: My apartment is so dirty that I actually lost my last girlfriend to the 5 second rule.