@NoTheOtherJohn: ATTORNEY: Ladies and gentlemen, how could my client have committed murder WHEN IT'S AGAINST THE LAW [whispering throughout courtroom]
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@ohpeetie: Today on Facebook: 1) Jen feels betrayed but doesn't want to talk about it 2) Kim started a prayer circle 3) Lori posted 87 recipes
@ipalatsky: it would probably never occur to you, but if need be, yellow pages book can knock your opponent out without any visible bruising.
@HatfieldAnne: My long legs mean I can emerge gracefully from an SUV. After that, every step looks like I was just released from a zero gravity experiment.
@River_Niles: Today I found out my nephew is scared of the vacuum.. Today I also found out I have a very dark cruel evil side to me..