@UncleDuke1969: Autocorrect is why I have crust issues.
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@ericsshadow: [wearing a 'World's Greatest Dad' t-shirt while talking to the bartender] "The younger one is about 8 and the older one is older than 8."
@RadOrDie: Give the chick a break. Kristen Stewart TOTALLY looks sorry. Or happy. Or sad. Or constipated.
@dragonsorbet: [Security breach at Wayne manor] BRUCE: *brooding darkly* ALFRED: The back door is literally just a waterfall
@RandomAntics: I'm told as a lady in my 30s I shouldn't wear certain things anymore - like halter tops, pigtails, and the scalps of my vanquished enemies.