@Gooooats: Avenge me! But only through passive aggressively commenting loudly around my murderer how great it would be to still have me alive.
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@JRehling: God talked to Jews like 500 times in the Old Testament, and not one warning about the Nazis.
@ruinedpicnic: Neil Armstrong: now where did I park my car? [presses key button] [tiny orange light flashes on the moon] god dammit
@squirrel74wkgn: My wife looks like the cats in those cucumber videos when she turns around & sees me naked.