@ElliceRocks: Aww you passed out, let's see what you've got in your wallet, shall we?
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@KentWGraham: My wife is not buying that Russians hacked my phone and texted that her mother is an overbearing windbag with no sense of boundaries.
@JasonLastname: As the officer approached my car I took a big pull of helium from the balloon and started crying
@Sean_Burgundy_: You can tell a lot about a woman by the way she organizes body parts in her freezer
@MavenofHonor: When I use my grandmother's cast iron skillet I feel close to her. Even though she's way, way up there repairing the space station