@Boleyngirly: Awww. It looks like the neighbors are having the police dept over for brunch..
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@LimeyTheGreat: Panty-less waxed woman hanging off a bridge "I'm gonna jump into that canoe". Me: "No that's your reflection".
@Manda_like_wine: Sorry I pretended I was drowning so you could see how incredible my hair looked underwater.
@IncrediblyRich: After six years of being responsible, I finally went and lost my phone last night. I'm currently using Twitter from the web. LIKE A CAVEMAN.