@__iCE_CREAM__: Babies who need to wear glasses creep me out. it's like they are trying to act smarter than me or something, I don't like it
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@oldmanweldon: UNITED EMPLOYEE: Beat this guy up so we can take the thing he paid for. LITERALLY THE POLICE: Okay
@Writepop: "And now it's time for Guess How Many Belly Rubs I Want! Remember, contestants, guess wrong and you get the claws!" - Cat game shows
@okaypup: I wish I was from Finland so when people asked if I was Finnish I could say "no, in fact, I'm just getting started"