@Steelers1972: Baby, I would run into a burning building from you.
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@hazelmotes1: Wife: wow, we must have had a lot of trick or treaters come by! Me: wha? Her: Because all the candy is gone Me: Ooooh right. So many.
@Rollmaninoz: Growing up, mum was always like a beautiful bird. She would fly away and when she returned many hours later she would puke everywhere.
@Tommytoughstuff: *gets pulled over by police* *shows a little skin* Officer: "Who's skin is that? Please step out of the vehicle sir."