@Steelers1972: Baby, I would run into a burning building from you.
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@Reverend_Scott: VENOM: Time to meet your maker! SPIDER-MAN: The radioactive spider? VENOM: No, like- SPIDER-MAN: My dad? Cuz he's dead. Wow, ur a douche.
@iwearaonesie: [movie theater] *reaches into wife's purse* *pulls out lasagna* me: Told you it'd work
@PajamaStew: If human civilization had a narrator it would just be some guy repeating "Little did they know..." over and over and over.