@josePhDhoran: *Baby presses 'snooze' to stay in womb extra 10 minutes*
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@HanaMichels: Yes, Neil, everything sounds better when you have a great voice. That's how sound works.
@Mr_Kapowski: If you're ever lost in the woods, try to find a bear to kill. Their claws will provide four sweet breakfast pastries.
@prufrockluvsong: Him: Flash me a smile. You're prettier when you smile. I seductively part my lips to reveal one perfect orange slice.
@Douchekevin: Wife asked if I was going to take out the trash. Told her I didn't know her sister needed a ride home. I'm bleeding. Call 911