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@TylerLinkin: Bacon causes cancer.
Canadian bacon apologizes.
@alkemp57: I've just invented a perfume made from holy water
Eau my God
@badAzz_mom: If you ever want your kids to communicate with you, just make sure you're talking to someone else on the phone.
@VancityReynolds: The pen is mightier than the sword. Also, parking a car in someone's living room sends a pretty damn clear message too.
@Marlebean: Sorry I gave you a sympathy card at your baby shower, but... well you'll see soon enough.
@Brampersandon_: Loan me a couple bucks?
*throws 2 huge deer carcasses on counter*
Dude where did u get those?
Can I even pay with these?