@rodimusprime: Bad guys gotta have a meeting and decide once and for all Liam Neeson's family is off limits.
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@bridger_w: I bet Adam and Eve loved being the first people cuz they didn't have to worry about ghosts
@Thynebear: Executioner: Before we do this, what would you like for your last meal? "I'll have a panda please" [judge, under his breath] Can he do that?
@GensPlace: Online dating has its good points. You can choose your own name, lie through your teeth and you can't smell their breath.
@JoshontheGo: Sorry, I can't take your call right now, I'm all tied up. -submissive's answering machine.