@Smooheed: Bad hair day 429: I no longer look as though I've been electrocuted, but the birds, so, so many birds
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@PetrickSara: My husband watched me clean the entire house today, and then asked me if I had a relaxing day. I get why the spouse is the first suspect.
@TheBoydP: A no carb diet can make you detached, remote and standoffish so occasionally you should eat aloof of bread.
@NewDadNotes: [first date] Date: well I had a great time tonight. Me: me too. Date: give me a ring sometime. Me: [pulls out engagement ring I brought just in case we clicked] this was my grandmothers-
@JT_IV_: I hope the people that monitor my sleep study tonight like watching a man scratch his taint.