@edgarrants: Bad idea? Son, I got married in my 20s. Ideas don't get any worse than that.
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@mynameisntdave: GENIE: u get 3 wishes! ME: for my first wish, I want a never-ending bowl of guac GENIE: guac, huh? Yeah, that's gonna cost you an extra wish
@TheBigBatman: Do you ever get shampoo in your eyes and wonder what the name of your guide dog will be?
@causticbob: Most people think that being in your 50s is now classed as the new 30s. Take my word for It, the police speed cameras think differently
@Token_Geezer: Girl said she wanted to have my babies so I invited her over. But she didn’t look happy when I told her to put them to bed by 8 and went out