@Jandalize: Bad news: I think I may have broken my toe. Good news: the smart car I tripped over will be alright.
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@Not_a_JesusGirl: There is nothing funnier than yelling "SHE'S STEALING MY BABY!" at a mom having a hard time with her kid in public.
@ThisOneSayz: Breaking news: There's been an alarming rise of close call heart attacks. The first symptom is, "you almost gave me a heart attack!"
@echoVista: You just HAD to let snakes and spiders on the Ark, didn't you Noah? Way to go, man. Way. To. Go.