@TheBananaFacts: Bananas will never talk shit about you. Not because they don't have mouths....but because they respect the choices you make.
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@INDlAN_: If you think it hurts to lose a boyfriend/girlfriend, you've clearly never lost close to 500 GB's worth of data on your hard drive.
@lovemyboots111: Apparently asking the boss " who ignited the fuse on your tampon?" will get you sent to HR.
@LMHPhotog: Next time you’re swallowed by a whale, stand up through the blowhole like it’s a sunroof on a limo. Throw your arms up. Have some fun!