@shutupmikeginn: Banned from Yelp for including "the rat seems to be vulnerable to attacks from behind or when adjusting mask" in my Chuck E Cheese review
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@WritePlay: "What an awesome body-" Oh... thanks. I work out- "- of research." - formulas. I work out formulas. *sips tea* I do a lot of math.
@rickygervais: The people who shout the loudest about their all powerful God protecting them & delivering them from any evil, also own a gun, just in case.
@Clare_innit: It's fun to smudge your lipstick and ruffle your hair before you come out of your bosses office, then give your work colleagues a wink.
@TheRealRHB: Wife: Don't you think the yard needs to be mowed? (from my recliner I check google maps satellite view of our house) Me: It looks fine to me