@agathagotstoned: Barring any distractions, it only takes about three months to teach a meerkat how to throw knives.
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@kristygee: I show extra confidence at a job interview by giving a firm handshake before and after every question.
@truegritrumble: HER:He doesn't trust me. THERAPIST:How so? HER:He's always spying on me. ME (dressed as Therapist):Really? THERAPIST:WTF HER:WTF ME:WTF
@murrman5: "fine! leave me because I talk like I'm in a novel but you aren't taking the kids, he exclaimed"
@AmberTozer: "Hang out with different people everyday so the only person who knows you've been wearing the same outfit all week is you" - my fashion blog