@SamuelHLowe: "Based on a true story" means it happened more or less like this, but with ugly people.
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@imskytrash: barista: name for the latte? me: it's Zach with an "h" *two minutes later* barista: i've got a latte for Hach
@shutupmikeginn: In order to save space, Ricky Gervais & Seth McFarlane are both one guy now. Frankly, it's been a long time coming
@Jandalize: Karma is my daughter bragging about getting to sleep late this week and forgetting to turn off her alarm.