@SuperRandomish: Based on how poorly this burrito was wrapped, I assume it was made by the one person at Taco Bell that has never rolled a blunt.
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@UnFitz: Some cultures fear that when someone takes your photograph they steal your soul. You should be fine, though.
@RobElliottComic: Me: congrats! Are you pregnant? Her: (awkwardly) Noooo... Me: *panics* do you wanna be? -great save- thanks brain
@LuvPug: It must be pretty inconvenient when you meet someone from a dating site and you're already married to them.